(To JS/07 M 378
This Marble Monument
Is Erected by the State)
By W.H. Auden
He was found by the Bureau of Statistics to be
One against whom there was no official complaint,
And all the reports on his conduct agree
That, in the modern sense of an old-fashioned word, he was a saint,
For in everything he did he served the Greater Community.
Except for the War till the day he retired
He worked in a factory and never got fired,
But satisfied his employers, Fudge Motors Inc.
Yet he wasn’t a scab or odd in his views,
For his Union reports that he paid his dues,
(Our report on his Union shows it was sound)
And our Social Psychology workers found
That he was popular with his mates and liked a drink.
The Press are convinced that he bought a paper every day
And that his reactions to advertisements were normal in every way.
Policies taken out in his name prove that he was fully insured,
And his Health-card shows he was once in a hospital but left it cured.
Both Producers Research and High-Grade Living declare
He was fully sensible to the advantages of the Installment Plan
And had everything necessary to the Modern Man,
A phonograph, a radio, a car and a frigidaire.
Our researchers into Public Opinion are content
That he held the proper opinions for the time of year;
When there was peace, he was for peace: when there was war, he went.
He was married and added five children to the population,
Which our Eugenist says was the right number for a parent of his generation. And our teachers report that he never interfered with their education.
Was he free? Was he happy? The question is absurd:
Had anything been wrong, we should certainly have heard.
Note on the Change in Life-status of a User
—Thoughts and Prayers
(sans crowdfunding request)
in memorial of the passing
of UpopS69—
Her accounts did not call for suspension,
and her online activity did not prove suspicious.
To ads she gave attention an average of 0.6 seconds,
And her rate of purchase activity in its contribution
to revenue was steadily consistent.
The frequency with which she checked social media
was appropriate for her age and status.
The algorithms, could they but do more than count,
would have approved the number of contacts her activity added to the database.
She was accurately tracked;
Offers in anticipation of the births and age-related changes of her two children
appeared as appropriate.
Our networks could not but help to closely follow her activity
in the course of her divorce and remarriage.
Her preparation for a second career could not have happened
without our following every detail of her training.
The images and comments she posted were well received
according to the accounting of her Likes, Upvotes
and other user-generated ratings.
She reposted memes that correctly reflected the mood of her Party
and her Nation,
And her gestures supporting the troops and reacting to news
of natural disasters appropriately reflected prevailing fashion.
She changed jobs without record of excessive unemployment
according to the designs of her employers,
And acquiesced to changing her places of residence,
as noted by information accessed from her movers.
A credit check shows she was late with no more than the the minimum
number of payments, and that her score was above average.
The balances she sustained on her accounts proved steadily lucrative.
The attitude of her comments accurately measured the fluctuations
of the economy.
When she fell ill, her medical expenses did not prove
excessively burdensome to her insurers,
so no cause could be found to cancel her policy.
Our systems have been following her to her quiet end.
We can find nothing of concern in the records or the numbers…
…is she a user we are likely to forget?
With the millions like her un-deceased, (as we prepare to delete her account),
what more of us could you hardly expect,
than to make sure that “inactive” flags in the files linked to her name are set?
This One & This One 